Excuses

Life got in the way.

I locked my keys in the car.

Allergies. The train went local.

I couldn’t get it to print.

The fugu was tainted.

I don’t have a good desk.

2-for-1 margaritas… with fresh juice.

Solar eclipse.

No hot water.

I wrote it down on the wrong month of my datebook.

Mercury retrograde.

I forgot how to do footnotes.

Tomato blight.

Afraid of failure.

Afraid of success.

It was an essay question?

I thought it was rhetorical.

I figured if I succeeded, Kanye West would steal my thunder anyway, so I gave up instead.

I’m too tired to think/write/call/drive/problem-solve, but who’s up for dessert?

Sick Day Excuses Found on Get Odd.com

My stigmata’s acting up.

The voices told me to clean all the guns today.