When my pesto “recipe” was part of Funny not Slutty’s Food Week, I said you couldn’t screw this recipe up unless you used poison ivy. Last night I tried another variation, and it too was delicious. And since I remembered what a pain in the ass it is to use a blender to make more than a tiny amount of pesto, I pulled out my broken, uni-bladed, hand-me-down food processor. So. Much. Easier. (But now I do need to buy a new food processor, because that one needs to be allowed to die with dignity.)
In an effort to prove my hypothesis that:
Pesto* = Green, Leafy Stuff + Oil + Garlic + Cheese
I tried making pesto with a head of broccoli rabe. It worked! If you’re like me and are incapable of following recipes, don’t sweat. Despite the approximate quantities listed below, I actually measured NOTHING. I just threw things (raw) into the food processor. (Remember fearful ones: there’s no recipe jail.) Again, you can’t mess this up.
1 bunch broccoli rabe
1/2 cup basil (I would have used more basil, but I only have two plants in my garden and I didn’t want to strip them naked. We have people coming over and they’d have been embarrassed.)
1/2 cup arugula
5 cloves garlic
1/2 cup olive oil (Mine was an extra virgin, poor girl.) ((Mom, stop reading.)) (((Does that mean she didn’t even masturbate?))) ((((Oh, eww. I was referring to the extra virgin, not my mother.))))
1/2 cup grated parmesan (NOT out of the can. I’m serious.)
Pasta with Broccoli Rabe Pesto and Shrimp:
1 box whole wheat pasta (but use what you want)
14 oz. cooked, peeled, tail-on shrimp (16-20 size) (because that’s what I got on sale; chicken would be fine too)
6 oz. pesto, above
8 oz grape tomatoes
2 oz. goat cheese
salt and pepper to taste
Mix everything up. Serve with grated parmesan and (if you like the spicy) red pepper flakes on the side.
* Author’s Note: I’m not trying to give your italian grandma a heart attack. Real Genovese Italian pesto always uses basil and pine nuts. That’s why I added the asterisk. These modern spins on pesto are tainted pestos. Like the steroid era home run hitters, they can be viewed by purists with disdain. Then again, I don’t think my tens of followers include many italian grandmas nor culinary purists. You guys all swing a little, right?
** Author’s Other Note: Feel free to add more cheese and olive oil. I use less oil because I add more as I need it, depending upon who’s eating and what I use the pesto for. And we’re all cheese adders, so I let that happen at the table.