Six months ago, I took a few minutes to learn how to fold a fitted sheet.  I was good at it for a week or so, but since then, my skills have been atrophying (see photo below for the gruesome proof.)

can't fold a fitted sheet

Sadly, this is only a twin sheet. You DON'T want to see the king-size.


So now after I post this, I’m going to go back on YouTube and find those “How to fold a fitted sheet” videos once again.

I’m going back into sheet rehab, it seems.

PS: Aren’t we supposed to have Jetsons-style household robots by now?  Can’t Apple get on this?

PPS: I just got back from trolling the related articles that popped up when I wrote this post.  I watched a few extremely anal people fold sheets, got sidetracked by an article about Ben Folds, was puzzled (but kind of flattered) that an article entitled “Build a Hovercraft” was somehow recommended to me.  That seems pretty irresponsible on someone’s part.  What if I, a woman who can’t properly fold a sheet, were to build a hovercraft and then take someone on a surely disastrous Hindenberg of a flight?  What if that person would have cured cancer had I not prematurely killed them with my amateur ill-designed hovercraft?  As a humanitarian, I took the high road, and skipped over that article.  You’re welcome.

PPS: This is actually how my brain works.  Is it a surprise that I can’t get anything done?  Is this adult ADD?  That’s actually a serious question…

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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

nonamedufus June 4, 2012 at 11:21 pm

Go back to normal sheets. Who needs that grief – or to spend all that time on the internet!


K A B L O O E Y June 5, 2012 at 11:33 pm

You mean you use flat sheets on the mattress? Isn’t that more work? I’m lazy, Dufe, and I have a bad back. I don’t want to be bending over and puttering over the corners…


Lee June 5, 2012 at 1:31 am

This cracks me up. First, I didn’t know they made these videos and now I am going to have to search for them, because I have never been able to fold a fitted sheet, I just crumble them up into a ball and stuff them on the shelf.


K A B L O O E Y June 5, 2012 at 11:31 pm

Hey, that’s my patented method!


Andrea June 5, 2012 at 6:50 am

Every time I pretend to be folding sheets, as opposed to just mushing those fitted ones into submission, I think of you and swear I will remember to watch the video. Not sure if I am disappointed or relieved to find out that your crisp corners have faded!


Smooshiest June 5, 2012 at 9:53 am

Well, because I remember things better long-term, I can still fold a fitted sheet; I learned how to during my sleeping camp days. Stuck with me. Now, ask me to fold clothing, that’s another thing – my mother is cringing as I type this.


K A B L O O E Y June 5, 2012 at 11:32 pm

There are videos for this too, but I’m busy ignoring them. I suppose ironing should be next on my list, but somehow I doubt it will be.


Alexandra June 10, 2012 at 10:12 am

You know what, woman?

You need to start a link up to combat the poetic stream of consciousness that people put out there.

The one I can’t ever join into b/c my stuff in my brain would lose me readers by the tens.

You need to do an “addled brain dumping”

B/c that’s the stuff that’s real.


Kablooey June 10, 2012 at 11:07 pm

If I knew how to set up the link-up thing, maybe I’d do it. But if I lost tens of readers, it’d just be you and me, babe.


Leave a comment; I'll be your best friend.

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